This was written by Sandra Oh for Esquire magazine:
1. If you want to date an Asian sister, do not do the following:
(a) Tell me about your trip to Asia and how you taught English there.
(b)Tell me how much you just looove Chinese food.
(c) Practice your Japanese on me. I'm Korean.
2. When we're fighting about the toothpaste cap, we're not really fighting about the toothpaste cap. We're fighting about that thing that happened three or four months ago at what's-his-face's house when you neglected that major issue we have — which, by the way, is fundamental.
3. When we have been pleasured and you haven't yet (and it's your turn), no matter what we say, make it quick.
4. We have an infinite vocabulary for colors. Fuchsia is not pink, nor is it red. Khaki is not green, nor is it brown. There is more than blue and green on the color wheel.
5. If it's over, just tell us. If you're sitting around afraid of hurting us, it only makes the relationship so unbearable that we have to break up with you. We're actually stronger than you think, so even though we may cry more than you do, we're way more resilient.
6. When you ask us if we're angry and we say we're fine, we're lying.
7. This one I can't tell you.
8. It doesn't matter how big the bauble, how fabu the restaurant — the time you spent on that pencil drawing of our eye or that haiku written on the vintage hotel stationery you found in Omaha is what truly steals our hearts.
9. You know that coworker of yours with the huge boobs whom you've fantasized us having a threesome with? Ask her.
10. So, you want to know the surefire way to get laid? Start by cleaning the house.
